A conflicted teacher

 I haven’t been a teacher for long, just five and a half years, but these past two years have been somewhat of a challenge and for months now I have done nothing more than go through the motions. My inspiration, my passion, my drive.. the things I believed distinguished me from others.. all gone. The reasons for that are varied and complex; the current pandemic has not helped all that much, this is true. But it’s more than that. More than the online teaching, the long hours, the ungrateful parents, the never-ending paperwork or the unruly kids.  You see, it’s about being part of a system you no longer believe in without being able to escape. I knew before I started that a job in education was not going to be easy. But I figured that it was worth it because at the end of the day I’d be making a difference. However, after five years the stone cold truth is that, although I do make a difference, it will never be enough. There will always be children that I can’t help, problems that I ca